Kissing someone hot for the first time is exciting and stimulating. But do you know how to be a great kisser? Let me show you how!
- Create a romantic ambience.
Gary Vaynerchuk once said, “Content is king; context is God.” When this theory is used in the dating department, it should be phrased in this way: what you do is king; when, where and how you do it is God. Please let me explain.
When it comes to kissing someone for the first time, what you do (kiss) is the ultimate goal. Meanwhile, the ambience and your kissing techniques determine whether this goal can be achieved or not.
Therefore, you should either choose a romantic setting or create a romantic setting. For instance, you can take your date to a romantic café where you can sit next to each other (side by side) – this will allow you to physically escalate on each other more easily.
Another option is to create a romantic ambience. For example, you can take your date to your place where candles and wine are both ready. Remember: candles with the right fragrance can turn on your date instantly (think the scent of Ylang-Ylang and sandalwood). Also, wine is a natural dating tool because after drinking some alcohol, people are less guarded.
Of course, you can even prepare some chocolates with wine in it, e.g. rum truffle, because chocolate is an aphrodisiac which creates positive chemicals in the human brain – it makes you fall in love.
- Maintain and break eye contact.
The right eye contact isn’t about staring at your date for an hour. In fact, it’s more complicated than you think, but it can be learned.
First of all, you need to assess when you should begin to ignite the passionate eye contact with your date. Maybe you can get started when you give your date a rum truffle. Or you can begin to look at his/her eyes when you finish a glass of wine.
The point is you need to know when your date is ready. In other words, your date will give you signals. Is his/her voice becoming more gentle? Does he/she look for excuses to “accidentally” touch you? If the answer is yes, now you can initiate the sexy eye contact.
Next, you look at your date’s eyes in an intense way during the silence. (Yes, introducing pauses is very powerful and sexual because talking all the time doesn’t give you opportunities to build massive sexual tension.) This is also called “hell-fire eye contact” which is a term coined by dating coach Liam McRae in his book Rapid Escalation.
Now I’d like you to break the eye contact by looking at your date’s nose for a second, and then looking at your date’s lips for a second, and then looking at your date’s eyebrows for a second. That is to say, your eyes are slowly travelling on your date’s face. This must be done gradually and naturally. At the same time, you should have a slightly drunken look on your face. (That’s why I said using some alcohol helps in the first place!)
I’m pretty sure your date knows what’s happening because he/she has seen enough Hollywood movies and late-night TV shows to understand what it means.
- Get closer to your date and touch him/her.
Yes, I know your goal is to kiss your date, but you’d better do it slowly so that the anticipation makes the kiss even more intoxicating.
Hence, it’s time to get closer to your date physically and feel the sexual tension without kissing your date.
Then, you can touch your date’s arm or back. Make it natural and sexy. Switch off your analytical brain and switch on your primal brain.
Feel the sexual tension in your body and let it stay there. Your hand should move slowly on your date’s arm or back. Notice his/her reaction.
If your date obviously enjoys it, you can keep doing it. Honestly, as long as your date doesn’t reject you in this case, you know it’s on.
- Begin to kiss your date.
Okay. You can kiss the date. When you do this, make sure you slightly close your eyes so that you look a bit intoxicated. Note that how you feel will influence how your date feels because right now you two are in the same energetic field.
Your lips lightly touch your date’s lips. Make the process slow and mindful.
Now you can touch your date’s lower back while kissing your date. This is a sensitive zone no matter your date is a man or a woman as it’s close to the reproductive organ, but it’s not too direct.
Then your tongue can start to explore your date’s mouth. Use your tongue to feel his/her lips and tongue. Feel the temperature of your date’s most sensual area.
You may even make this more intense by feeling your date’s heartbeat, meaning your chest should get closer to his/her chest. In this way, the upper body can be turned on, especially when the woman’s breasts are pressed against a man’s chest.
- Bonus tips:
- You can play some music in the background, e.g. a playlist of café music without lyrics. Or a list of songs with foreign lyrics that you can’t understand. This is because if you are listening to songs with lyrics that you can understand, the music becomes a distraction.
- You can make some sexy noises while kissing your date no matter you are a man or a woman. This shows your date that you are into it, you like your date, you enjoy this sensuous interaction with your date.
- You can pre-frame the make-out session by watching a romantic movie or TV show before the date. A case in point is watching Mad Men before the make-out session because Don Draper’s affairs will make both of you start to think about having a good time in the bedroom. This is especially helpful if you and/or your date just had a hectic day at work – you need a mindset shift before enjoying the date.